Is There an "American" Culture?

In a discussion about diversity, an issue was raised as to our "unifying American culture". When we tried to pin it down, it was difficult to actually define what that was. It is clear that whatever culture we have is dynamic and always changing. One benefit of old age is being able to have a perspective of more years to compare and analyze.

The issue that started the discussion was previous postings on this blog. They were Diversity, Diversity Again, and Pretending to be Normal. I posit that diversity is one of the hallmarks of humanity, not what makes "them" different from "us".

Pretending to be normal

Since my diagnosis with High Functioning Autism (HFA)/Asperger's Syndrome (AS) at age 57, I have been reading a lot about autism and aspergers. What I find most interesting has been individual stories of how they have/are coping with the not being normal "problem". I have been most intregued by Temple Grandin and Lianne Holliday Willey.

In Emergence and Thinking in Pictures, Temple talks about the difficulties fitting in socially with the "normals" when it was the "normals" who were really the ones displaying poor social skills. She found a physical way to meet her need for close contact but could not stand to have other people touch her or be real close. She created a "hugging" machine from a cattle chute.

Lianne discovered her "aspieness" when her daughter was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. She felt like she had arrived home. Now she could "joyfully talk to herself" without feeling like a freak. Her daughters frequently do have to remind her not to talk to herself in public or around others. This is just one example mentioned in her book, Pretending to be Normal.

I read an interview with the authors of a book call Autism/Asperger's and Sexuallity. They were a married couple who both had Asperger's. When asked what the most important thing for individuals with Autism/Asperger's to do, one of them responded that looking and being as normal as possible was the most important thing for an aspie to do. This comment was made several times during the interview. This really did disturb me. If I could do that, I would not have problems with social settings, and basically AS does not exist.

I have tried to "appear as normal as possible" all my life. Did I succeed? Not really, especially after I had been in a situation (friendship, job, group, church, etc.) for a while. In fact, it became harder and harder after 45. Most of the time the problem developed around understanding the "rules", especially the "obvious", "everybody knows that", and those crazy hidden rules. The best news I have received in 30 years was the diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome. I felt like Lianne--I had finally found why I was like I was.

Someone asked me last Summer what it was like to receive the diagnosis at such a late time in life. My response was, "It is much better to have a 'disability' than to be a jerk".

What I am finding out about this who "pretending to be normal" dilema is simple. You have to know who you are before you can "act normal". I have come to the conclusion that I am far much happier just being me, with all the baggage that brings. I have STOPPED pretending to be normal. You can't mimmic something that does not exist. I have realized that "normal" is the creation of the testers and those who would like to dominate and subject me to their supposed superiority.

I am in good company. There are many, many creative geniuses whose recorded behavior fits the HFA/AS criteria. This is a very short list: Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Edison, Mozart, Orson Wells, Albert Einstein, Charles Darwin, Glenn Gould, Oscar Levant, Carl Sagan, and Bill Gates.

Diversity, Again

It is Diversity that identifies what is different between individuals, groups, regions, countries, and so on. Noticing differences in an individual is validating his/her uniqueness. Without observing and identifying differences, the old pass-time of "people watching" would be as interesting as counting sheep or watching the sidewalk.

It is when those differences are used to sort human beings into categories. The primary purpose of these categories is to rate the value of the individual in each category. The most significant example of this is the intellegence test. People's lives are rated by the likelyhood of success. Then the educational system works overtime to prove the ratings accurate. These tests carry extreme power over the course of an other wise talented individual. The examiner is telling the individual tested, "You are defective, and I am not. I define what is 'abnormal' and that is you."

The other day my wife, daughter, and I spoke with a handsome 20 year old young man (K.G.) who we had known for several years. I knew that he had been labeled ADHD and that things were sometimes difficult for him. Many people around him considered him a troublemaker mostly because of his difficulty with social cues. I told him about my own mis-diagnosis of ADHD and my recent rediagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome or HFA (high functioning autism). His said that he had also be correctly rediagnosed with HFA. His story made me want to cry, scream, rip apart a few of our "esteemed" local school district officials. The school psychologist that had worked with K.G. for several years told him on several occasions that he would never amount to anything and that he would never graduate from school. The principal told him basically the same thing. When he did graduate from high school, he went back with his diploma and shoved it in the face of the school psychologist and the principal. He is now attending an community college and working as a chef (not a cook) for a very fine restaurant at an exclusive resort in the San Bernardino Mountains.

With the support of his family, he literally had to defy and challenge those whose job it was to enable him to succeed. Not every one has that kind of courage to take those opposing him by the horns and throwing them out of his way!

In this anecdote, who are the "disabled" and who is the "abled"?

There are many stories to tell about those with the least resources having to make the greatest effort to succeed.

Diversity

There is much talk in the media and in political speech about diversity. But what is diversity? To hear some talk, you would think that diversity was referring to minorities or "other" ethnic groups. Leaders of political parties and community leaders will tell you how much they embrace diversity. What are they really saying? "I welcome you into the real world (as long as you behave and remember your place)."

I think of diversity in a much broader sense. Diversity is what brings us (everyone) together. There is not "us" and "them". It is WE, us'uns. Diversity is what makes us all the same. Without diversity, the earth would be the most boring , ugly place. I am talking abot big, small, tall, short, skinny, fat, healthy, unhealthy, the allegedly "non-disabled".